BY FRANK DAVIES

 WASHINGTON -- For Janet Reno, efforts to force the unification of Elian Gonzalez
 and his father got tougher Wednesday. Ironically, it happened April 19, the
 anniversary of her most harrowing days as attorney general.

 Although the 11th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals in Atlanta didn't order that the
 6-year-old be handed over to his father, Juan Miguel, as the government had
 asked, Reno noted that the decision dealt solely with an asylum claim, not with
 who has custody of the boy.

 ``We are going to take and consider all our options, and take the course of action
 that we deem appropriate under the circumstances,'' said Reno upon arrival in
 Oklahoma City for a memorial service marking the fifth anniversary of the terrorist
 bombing.

 Earlier, during a briefing before the ruling, she responded to criticism that she has
 been indecisive or moved too slowly:

 ``If the criticism of me is that Im trying to avoid violence, if the criticism of me is
 that Im trying to avoid that little boy being hurt or being snatched in a way that
 can scar him further, I plead guilty.''

 Wednesday was also the anniversary of the 1993 use of force at Waco she
 approved during her first month on the job. Reno dismissed any facile parallels:
 The Elian standoff was not Waco, and it wasnt the Miami riots of 1980.

 The Elian custody dispute is unique, she said, and she is determined to
 ``minimize the chances for violence.''

 ``There may come a time when there is no alternative'' to using force to retrieve
 the boy, she said, ``but weve got to do it in a thoughtful, careful way.''

 Reno was asked about the impact of Waco, the Montana Freemen case -- a
 standoff with militia members that ended peacefully -- and the riots in Miami 20
 years ago.

 ``In all these situations you try to draw from experience, but each case is
 different,'' she said.

 She rejected a comparison between the Elian saga and Waco, the standoff with
 the Branch Davidians.

 ``In Waco, you had people who not only defied the law but killed people in the
 process. Theres a lot of difference.''

 As for the Miami riots that followed her offices failure to win a conviction in a
 police brutality case, she said curtly: ``Ive never felt responsible for riots.''

 While Reno has avoided a confrontation over Elian, she also spoke forcefully
 about the need to reunite father and son -- and do it soon.

 Reno also said the videotape of Elian released by the Miami relatives ``made me
 very sad. It is so important that all of us turn off the TV lights, stop writing in your
 papers, start thinking about a little boy and getting his life to some permanent
 resolution.''